Catharsis– the process of releasing, and thereby providing relief from, strong or repressed emotions.
I saw a post about the top 12 blogs for people with diabetes (all of which lacked racial diversity) and started reflecting on our families experience with this condition. I wanted to represent us in the discussion. I guess to me that meant placing T1D out there from the lens of one family of color. It seemed like it might be important to other families and children to see and know. And so sweetbrownchild was born.
What I didn’t consider three months ago was that in writing about this part of our lives I was doing a service to myself. Writing has turned, quite honestly into a personal endeavor and it is indeed cathartic. Unknowingly, I’ve been addressing, albeit very publicly, the complicated flurry of emotions that comes with having a child who experienced significant life change related to her health. As much as this blog is about bringing awareness to how this condition has impacted our family and sharing the lessons we are continually learning, it’s also about me as a mom. Woven into each paragraph there are pieces of me laid out for you to see. I did it quite unknowingly and even unintentionally, you see. I didn’t start writing to highlight my journey as a mom, but there are remnants of me here.
Let’s not lose sight of the fact that ultimately this blog IS about T1D and how we purposefully support Anabel through this one aspect of her life. Over the last few months I have received comments and private correspondence about how this space has created an opportunity for people of color and valued others to connect to the diverse representation with T1D. Some of these have touched me so deeply I was brought to tears, in some really inconvenient times and places. (Picture me waiting for a meeting to start and hearing a ping on my phone. I read a short email and the tears start as a colleague walks into the room. Yep, I had to try to explain that one away.) Despite my poor choices in timing when reading these valued sentiments, they have reinforced the importance of telling our story, one that seems to be at times overlooked.
As one year slips away and another is on the horizon I’m grateful for the stats and traffic on our blog. However, as much as I write for you and children who look like Anabel and have a similar experience, I’ve realized I’m writing for me too.
So here’s to a new year with as much catharsis as one can tolerate and a continuation of the vision for sweetbrownchild blog.